Friday, August 15, 2014

Moving ahead with life ^_^

What’s holding me back? Memories and too much thinking of my “old” life that was filled with memories and people I loved. The people are now gone or not available, and activities no longer seem interesting. So, I’m simplifying my living situation. I am going to try and appreciate the new people and activities in my life although they are not what I initially wanted. Definitely the one thing holding me back is fear! I have fear of failure, fear of loss, fear of what I am really truly capable of doing. To be happy and content, I need to make a decision which will totally change my life. Keeping the fear alive is only keeping me stuck in a very negative situation.
I have recently realized that I have been holding on to them. It seemed to have lost myself by making them the center of my life. Now, I am experiencing loneliness and doubts about where to go from here and how to do it. I know I need to move on and live MY life. I am taking small steps. I’m working on making a life for me. I am scared, but also anticipating a life where I can do whatever I want.
I realized that, no one else can succeed for me on my behalf.  The life I live is the life I build for myself.  There are so many possibilities to choose from, and so many opportunities for me to bridge the gap between where I am and where I want to be.  Now is the moment to actually step forward.
I am working on giving up on a person that I cherish a lot… seems so tough to let go because we have been such good friends and close in relationship. (We are not even talking about EM!….sigh)… I really don’t know what made me to change my mind.  I have done but perhaps it is time to let go and move on. I really cry and it’s heartbreaking that, such a great relationships have to come to an end. Guess I need to remember constantly.
Giving up doesn’t always mean I am weak or wrong in any way. Sometimes it simply means I am strong enough and smart enough to let go and move forward with my life.

When I am letting go of the past, I forgive what needs forgiving, and I am moving forward, I cannot change the past, but I know I can change the future… 
Please forgive me I forgave you
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